Irrational Fears and New Goals

I have an irrational fear. That's of hospitals. I'm ok if I'm going to visit a new mom or doing something Mary Kay related, but to actually go and visit someone in the hospital -- that's terrifying for me. A couple of years ago when the woman I've adopted as my grandmother had to have knee replacement surgery, I went and visited her the day after her surgery. She wasn't in ICU or anything like that. Just a regular room. I literally sat in the car for 10 minutes before walking in. And through the entire visit, I was extremely tense. I can pinpoint exactly when this fear started. I was 11 years old and Daddy had died. True he didn't actually die in the hospital, he'd collapsed at breakfast, but the hospital is still what I remember vividly. Since that time, hospitals terrify me. In fact, one of my favorite books, Donovan's Daughter by Lori Wick, is my favorite because of how I relate to the main character, Marcail.

Marcail has a fear of doctors and finds herself married to one. Her fear stems from the doctor who diagnosed her mother's illness and shortly after her mother died. While I don't fear doctors, it's the same concept for me with hospitals.

But I'm slowly making strides. Yesterday I'd invited myself over to my cousin's for dinner. I do that pretty regularly, so it's nothing really new. Earlier this week, my uncle had been put in the hospital for a heart cath. He ended up needing to have a triple bypass surgery. And then he had a bleeder, so they opened him up again to stop it. Which they did and he's doing ok. Needless to say, he's still in the hospital, ICU basically. So instead of dinner and a movie at my cousin's, we went to visit my uncle in the hospital. For the first time, I really was ok. I didn't actually go back and see him as his visitors were restricted to immediate family only, so I visited with my aunt, my uncle's sister, and his daughter in the waiting room. I know that the only reason I didn't have to give myself a pep talk was because I didn't actually see my uncle. That and I'd been praying before hand for the strength to go. I'm nowhere near over the fear, but I am making progress.


I've decided to set some new goals for my business. We have a brand new skin care line, Botanical Effects. Here is the new e-catalog featuring this line. So my goals. I want to facial a minimum of 30 people in the month of March to try the new botanical line. I want to do another 30 in April, and another 30 in May. Which means I need to call my customers to tell them about this new line and ask them to be on my panel to try it. I've been using it for a week and I love love love it. And I need to hold parties all 3 months so that I will also have the sales and even possibly earn my red jacket. So March I'm focusing on skin care. I have a few samples of the botanicals I'm sending to a few of my customers who live out of town/state.